When Elderly Parents Are Abusive Any type of silent treatment is unhealthy and should be addressed, communicated, and resolved as soon as possible. Elderly parents who give their children quiet treatment have a problem with themselves, and they may even struggle to deal with loneliness. Caring for a toxic, critical, or abusive parent can cause difficult emotions, make it difficult for parents to care for, and at the same time worsen many stressors that already stem from providing care. Setting boundaries with struggling elderly parents won't fix it everything.
Even so, it can help you stay resilient in the face of toxic situations and behaviors. Here are some tips to help you. We have all heard about toxic parents and the influence they have on their children, whether they are young, teenagers or adults. Setting boundaries with struggling elderly parents from an early age can go a long way in preventing those negative feelings from accumulating and causing caregiver burnout.
Some elderly parents are toxic and can influence you and your own grandchildren, not to mention anyone else who approaches. One of the most complex parts of setting boundaries with difficult elderly parents is ignoring past offenses and resentments. Patience and persistence go a long way in making conversations productive when it comes to aging parents. Addressing the root of your feelings will make you more comfortable setting boundaries with difficult aging parents. If your elderly parent suddenly ignores you, whether for some disagreement or other unknown reason, this is toxic behavior.
Just like when you set limits on your struggling elderly parents, you should also be clear about your boundaries with your other loved ones. Toxic older parents try to make their children feel guilty for not taking care of them or for not coming to see them. It's not that I'm holding you responsible for all the toxic behavior, it's that being kind can sometimes cure things like this. If you recognize some of these toxic traits in your parents, there are ways to deal with these behaviors. Toxic parents have a way of instilling fear in their children, and sometimes this fear can last into adulthood.
These options may include another caregiver, scheduling rest breaks for you, or another care service for the elderly. Caring for a dysfunctional parent with increasingly difficult, toxic, and even abusive behavior is a difficult situation for any family caregiver. Dealing with aging parents can also be frustrating, especially if they refuse your help or advice.